sid | Stolen from eleventy-one people on my flist:

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Stolen from eleventy-one people on my flist:

If you read this, if your eyes are passing over this right now, (even if we don't speak often or ever) please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me.

It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.

When you're finished, post this little paragraph in your LJ and see what your friends come up with.

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Remember that time you and I were in that market in Tel Aviv, and you got accused of shop-lifting those condoms? And I started swearing at that shopkeeper, and we got arrested, and it turned your really DID shoplift the condoms? I'm still mad at you over that.

OMG! Remember that time we went to that BDSM club so you could do 'research'?
I know I agreed to let you try some light activities but, dude, I never expected you to do *that* to me.

I kinda liked it though.

Remember that time we got totally wasted and jumped in the fountain on campus? It's a good thing you persuaded me to keep my clothes on, what with the cops showing up and all.

I still can't believe you dated my brother.

You, me, the moonlight and the pitter patter of black-footed paws during the Unexplained Mass Weasel Migration of Ought-Six. We may not have each other, but we'll always have Paris, Kentucky.

::dabs daintily at one perfect tear at the corner of her eye::

Remember that time we were still up at four in the morning and decided we had to go see Star Wars 'right this instant' so we found a showing going on in Omaha and set out, but only got as far as the Perkins across town before we were had to pull over for coffee and a nap? Good times.

I'd just woken up, not really sure where I was or how I'd gotten there, when I saw a figure standing before me. Silhouetted against a brilliant white light, the apparition seemed like an otherworldly being, and I couldn't help but ask, "Am I in Hell?"

"No, just the hospital," you answered. Apparently, you were serving community service there for some infraction you refused to name, and my unfortunate encounter with a runaway rickshaw landed me in your tender mercies.

"Wait until they serve lunch," you continued, "THEN you'll understand what Hell is."

Remember when I was leaving for college, and you gave me that pocket knife? It wasn't new or anything, just one that you had around. I took it as some kind of being-prepared kind of thing, like it would be something handy for me to have if I needed it. Maybe even protection.

All I knew was it felt like you were taking care of me. I still have it, around here somewhere.

Why is it that you have such grand adventures with everyone but me? We had dinner, had a couple drinks at what we thought was a gay bar but turned out to be just some very jolly old guys and that was it. No binges, no police escorts, no unintended tattoos. Am I that boring?

You know, I don't know how you do it but I'd lived here for fifteen years and I didn't know there was a bar in town with a mechanical bull, and you came for a visit and it was totally like you had this amazing radar. And okay so yeah I did have a suitable hat. And who knew that the bartender in a place like that could actually make a perfect pousse cafe? Of course, after five of them, riding Old Sparky really seemed inevitable, didn't it?

And wasn't it so awesome that neither of us puked? We even got free t-shirts.

That time we were in the 7/11, browsing the meat aisle and the guy in the gorilla mask burst in brandishing a gun.

I had no idea a frozen chicken lobbed from 20 feet could be so effective! (Although I suppose I should have guessed, that sucker was *heavy*) I still chuckle at the look on the clerk's face when the chicken bounced onto the counter.

Remember when we hit the town dressed to the nines, but ended up wearing nuns' outfits and singing Sisters Are Doing For Themselves on a table in that glitzy gay bar?
No. me neither.
But it's on YouTube ... *wails*

It's all a bit of a blur but I remember you had this really hot guy on his knees kissing your boots, another guy in shackles against the wall and a boatload of alcohol. But you did share!

I've still got the Whisk.....but the yoghurt had to go.....*smiles enigmatically*....

Deeds xx

i remember a certain road trip... to the Grand Tetons... you know the one. Are you done your community service yet? I'm not. But i DID get that hot cop to kiss that camel AND got the picture to prove it. But yeah, can we never be in jail in the ozarks ever, ever again? Please?

I will never forget (in spite of years of therapy) the evening we finally met in RL – I didn’t even know you lived in the same state, let alone on the same floor of my apartment building. Not till you knocked on my door asking for help because your, um, ‘date’ had forgotten the keys to the shackles and you just ‘had this hunch’ that I might have a universal key, or a hacksaw, or maybe even be able to pick locks. (Let me guess . . . it was all the times you’d seen me going out on weekends wearing lingerie and stiletto boots, right?)

I have to admit, I totally forgave you for that when you invited me to join the party, and that silver-haired guy in the black leather was amazingly hot.

Yes, I still remember it as if it was yesterday . . . wait a minute . . . it was yesterday.

Remember when we went to P3... oh wait, we promised not to talk about that.

Okay, okay, I've got one. Remember when you told me that there was no such thing as As... oops, not that either.

Dammit, this is hard! Wait. I know. Remember when we were playing croquet with the flamingos and the pretty guy with the glasses came to talk to us about our Sekrit Society? And how he was nice, but then there was his silver-haired friend in the uniform who showed up and wanted us to get the hell off his lawn and we got in that argument and then the blonde lady with the needles snuck up behind us and... uh... I don't remember anything after that, do you?

sid_fan

I remember the time we floated down that river in a little row boat. The shores were lined with many native peoples all dressed in their colorful aboriginal clothing - so many different kinds of cloth all beautifully woven. But no matter how hard we rowed we couldn't get control of the boat. The current was just too strong and it took us where it wanted to go taking all choice away from us. Thankfully there were never any rapids. Funny thing though, with all the light and color and lovely smiles there was this incessant singing. I remember that it never stopped. It went on and on until it drove us crazy, endlessly beating at our eardrums until finally we could hardly see the finely beaded native costumes anymore and their happy welcoming smiles began to take on a sinister appearance. Oh how we wanted out. Eventually we realized we could have walked away, but by then it was too late. The damage was done and once we found freedom we both staggered away for a long rest in a sanitarium until that unending "It's a small world after all..." stopped ringing in our ears...

I've never been back to Disney since. How about you?

Rosie

I'm still pissed about being robbed of first place at the Society of Acrobatic Dance and Intermediate Synchronized Magic(or SADISM for short) 34th annual talent competition. Our flaming hula hoop trick was fantastic. Do you still have your matching jumpsuit? I had mine framed.

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