sid: (J/D nine inches?)
sid ([personal profile] sid) wrote2009-08-09 10:16 pm
Entry tags:

Jack/Daniel, rated R

Below the cut, Jack/Daniel, rated R, ~600 words.

Above the cut, my attempt to explain how this came about:  a few nights back, I was watching TV and I thought I heard the word 'crotch'.  I didn't, there was no context for it, I just thought I heard it.  My subconscious perked right up. 

A while later, I found myself thinking of Jack and Daniel and an alien with an interesting bulge.  My subconscious wasn't done yet.  Soon the alien was wearing tights.

"Men In Tights," I thought.  Oh, no,

[personal profile] tejas  already used that.  So, "Planet of the Men in Tights".

And then I realized (and [personal profile] tejas  will, too) why my subconscious led me where it did.  This will make no sense to anyone else.

I was eating pizza rolls.  :-)

 

 


 

Planet of the Men in Tights

 

An-badern had the biggest dick Jack had ever seen, he guessed. It’s not like he had a measuring tape, or like it was waving around out in the open. No, it was neatly tucked away, not out on display.

 

But, Christ, was it on display. Jack had all he could do not to stare. Carter had taken one look, turned red, and mumbled some excuse about soil samples, speeding away before Jack could do more than nod at Teal’c to go with her.

 

Yes, sirree. The biggest dick. And the skimpiest tights, on a planet where tights for the big shots apparently were the height of fashion..

 

It was more than a shadowy outline outlined, more than an amorphous bulge.

 

You could see everything.

 

Every. Fucking. Thing.

 

And Daniel Fucking Jackson was practically drooling, cock whore that he was. Normally Jack appreciated this facet of Daniel’s personality – appreciated it and then some. After all, he got to reap the benefits of his lover’s oral fixation, and since Jack had a bit of a thing for full, pink lips, it worked out really well all the way around.

 

Yeah, okay, Daniel wasn’t being obvious about it. His eyes flicked down once in a while. Hell, Jack’s did, too. It was pretty much involuntary, like his brain needed to verify what it had seen. Maybe make sure it hadn’t gotten any bigger while Jack wasn’t looking.

 

Maybe store the image away for future reference.

 

But Jack wasn’t licking his lips and his cheeks weren’t flushed. Not that he could tell, anyway. And his eyes definitely weren’t a bluer shade of blue as he hung on An-badern’s every fucking word. Not that Jack could hang on An-badern’s every word, since he couldn’t understand a single one of them.

 

Daniel stopped in the middle of a sentence as a man approached An-badern and whispered something into his ear. An-badern stroked his beard and nodded curtly. He rose from his bench, thigh muscles flexing and package shifting and Jack thought he maybe heard Daniel whimper, just a little. An-badern smiled at Jack, and at Daniel, said a few words and turned to leave.

 

“There’s a short break in the action,” Daniel said in a hushed voice.

 

“I got that,” Jack replied, watching An-badern’s ass retreating to the hallway, the skimpy, revealing tights clinging and molding his cheeks. Cupping. That was the word. Jack coughed.

 

“Jack,” Daniel moaned, very unprofessionally.

 

“I know.”

 

“I need you.”

 

A little thrill shot though Jack and a smile crept onto his lips. “Think I’ll suffice?”

 

Daniel licked his lips again, but this time it was all for Jack. “If I say you’ve always been more than enough you’ll just get a swelled head.”

 

Jack’s smile twitched into a grin. “That’s what happens when you stroke my ego.”

 

Daniel grinned back. “If you don’t have any other plans tonight, I’ll stroke anything you like.”

 

“Seven?”

 

Daniel nodded, and peered around Jack’s shoulder. “He’s coming back. I might be a little late; don’t start without me.”

 

“I make no promises.”

 

“I have to stop at the drug store.”

 

Jack tried to think of anything that they might need that they were out of. “For what?”

 

Daniel’s eyes were flicking up and down as An-badern approached, and back to Jack. “Pantyhose in your size?”

 

It was a good thing Jack wasn’t expected to take any part in the conversation that resumed after An-badern took his seat, since he was completely speechless.

 

And finding it harder than ever not to stare.

 

And painfully aware that, this time, his cheeks were flushed.

 


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