Cleaning up

[sid]

Remember Dreamverse? And Bjorn? I've never posted that story other than as chapters, but I have a file now that's almost ready to be posted.

But I've found a couple of errors I want to clean up:

At one point I used 'beg the question' incorrectly:

Jack’s heart clenched. He leaned back in his chair. “Is this conversation over yet?”

“Daniel… but you did not want to talk about Daniel.”

“Please,” Jack said through tight lips.

“I thought you should know these things.”

And didn’t that just beg the question of what Daniel had told Bjorn.

I want to replace the incorrect usage, but I still want to keep the bitter flavor of the original sentence. Somehow, 'didn't that just raise the question...' doesn't seem to work. Does anyone have a suggestion to re-work that sentence and still hang onto Jack's anger?


In a later section, I have Teal'c announcing his need to kel'no'reem. BUT, this is after Daniel descends, so Teal'c is on tretonin and doesn't need to kel'no'reem anymore. Does anyone recall canon references to kel'no'reem post-Season Six? Maybe he desires to kel'no'reem? It's really just an excuse to get Sam and Teal'c out of Jack's house, because PLOT...so he could just decide it's bedtime, it's getting late, he's tired, whatever. Thoughts?

Comments

[gategremlyn]

flaunt the question?

Teal'c says "I am unable to kel-no-reem as I once did since I began using tretonin" in 7.01 Fallen. He's sitting surrounded by candles and Daniel comes in. I don't know if he mentions anything like that before that episode. He loses the symbiote in Changeling (6.19), right?

[green_grrl]

Dreamverse!

Maybe: Jack suddenly wasn't sure he wanted the question of what Daniel had told Bjorn answered.

Teal'c can be doing an early-morning training with the Marines and have to go.

[princessofgeeks]

I guess I 'm an idiot but I thought beg the question was ok?

and t definitely went through the motions of kel no reem even after he went on tretonin. this is canon. it must have been more like straight up meditataion.

hi!

[ivorygates]

Does this help at all?

http://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/beg+the+question

[annejack]

Hmmm, I don't know why 'beg the question' is used incorrectly? It sounds good there to me.

But maybe : And doesn't that make you wonder what exactly Daniel had told Bjorn? Or; And, friends and neighbors, what exactly had Daniel told Bjorn?

I think Teal'c still did kel'no'reem as a mere meditation even when the symbiote was gone,though I don't have any canon reference at hand about that right now, sorry.

[ivorygates]

How about: And didn't that just open a great big can of worms?

[sg-wonderland.livejournal.com]

In answer to the second question, in Season Seven's 'Orpheus', Teal'c tells Daniel:

TEAL'C
Kel'no'reem is unnecessary. Although it does make me feel—better. Colonel O'Neill has officially informed me that—I have my 'mojo' back.

[lolmac]

I'm not entirely clear on what the 'beg the question' sentence is actually saying, or trying to say. Can you expand a bit? I think I have a couple of ideas, but I need a clearer sense of your intention before I offer any suggestions.