MarySue Throwdown - Star Trek style
Jun. 20th, 2008 02:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sidIt started when delphia2000 responded to this post, claiming Mr. Spock's love as her own. Foolish woman.
Then she posted a challenge in her journal. Really foolish woman.
Here is her paltry delphiaSue entry. Go.Mock. Enjoy.
Here is my winning entry:
delphia2000 responded to this post, claiming Mr. Spock's love as her own. Foolish woman. Then she posted a challenge in her journal. Really foolish woman.
Here is her paltry delphiaSue entry. Go.
Here is my winning entry:
MARYSID AMONGST THE STARS
tbc?
(I will totally write more if you guys like it! Srsly, let me know in the comments if you want to read more, cuz there's whole lots more to tell!! Love you guys!!!)
CHAPTER ONE
MarySid was getting ready for bed. She washed her face, leaving her lovely skin glowing with radiant health. She brushed her teeth until they gleamed like pearls. She brushed her long, flowing dark tresses with the exotic streak of white which framed her face, with its delicate features and large hazel eyes which sparkled with intelligence, counting each stroke until she reached one hundred.
She donned silky, sexy pajamas and smoothed one strap of the ruffled bra-top. Laying her glasses down carefully on the nightstand, MarySid climbed into bed and pulled the covers up over her slender, yet voluptuous body. She closed her eyes with a sigh, luxuriant long lashes fluttering, then resting quietly atop baby-smooth skin.
Soon she was asleep.
CHAPTER TWO
Mr. Spock was at his post on the bridge of the Enterprise, collating data from anomalous readings encountered near the seventh planet of a trinary star system, when he heard an unusual sound behind him. He turned alertly, just in time to see a shimmering outline hanging in the air which soon coalesced into a striking young woman who looked around with every evidence of shocked confusion.
“Stop… right where you are!” Captain Kirk ordered, rising from his chair. “What are you doing on my… bridge?”
She didn’t answer, but took a stumbling step backwards and put her hands out as though for balance.
“I said… don’t move!” the Captain repeated.
Spock rose quietly and stepped down onto the deck. The girl, for she could be no more than a teenager, looked towards him, startled.
“I don’t know where I am!” she exclaimed in an utterly entrancing voice, turning back towards the Captain.
“You’re on the bridge of the U.S.S. Enterprise,” Kirk told her. “And we’d… like to know how you got here.”
“So would I,” she said, appearing distraught.
Spock stepped closer and her gaze swung back to him. Her wide eyes watched him as he approached. Suddenly, when he was no more than two steps away, her eyes got even wider.
Her expression changed to one of terror, and she cried out. Then her eyes rolled up and her body began to crumple.
Spock caught her just before she hit the deck, unconscious.
CHAPTER THREE
MarySid thought she was dreaming at first. She should have been safely in her own dainty, feminine bedroom, but instead she was standing in an unfamiliar place, surrounded by people, blurs of bright color and flashing lights.
A commanding voice spoke to her. A man dressed in gold stood up and MarySid backed away from him, confused and frightened.
There was movement to her left, and she turned to see a dark-haired man in a blue shirt approaching slowly. “I don’t know where I am!” she said, looking back towards the golden man who had spoken.
He said she was on a bridge, but MarySid didn’t see any water. He wanted to know how she got here.
She wanted to know the same thing, desperately.
The movements of the man in blue caught her eye again, and she watched him anxiously.
As he came near her, the blurriness caused by her myopia lessened. His features came into focus.
His ears, my God!
MarySid opened her mouth to scream.
And then everything went black and she knew no more.
CHAPTER FOUR
“Get Doctor McCoy up here!” Kirk ordered, coming to crouch next to his First Officer.
Spock cradled the mysterious beauty’s head in his lap, his hand of its own volition stroking her silky-soft hair with its exotic streak of white framing her delicate-featured, currently very pale face. One strap of her sexy, ruffled bra-top had slipped off a creamy white shoulder, and he straightened it, noting with bewilderment that his fingers trembled as he did so.
“Spock, is she… ?”
Spock’s eyes were riveted to the magnificent bosom which rose and fell inside the ruffled bra-top. “She appears to be breathing quite normally, Captain.” Which was more than he could say for himself. “I believe that she has merely lost consciousness.”
“Swooned in your arms, you mean,” Kirk teased lightly. “You old dog.”
Spock frowned. “I do not understand what happened. My appearance appeared to alarm her, yet she had been more or less unperturbed by my approach until I got quite near.” He stared down at her creamy white eyelids, wishing that they would open so that he could once again see her wide hazel eyes. He was certain that they had sparkled with intelligence, and no matter how sexy her strange clothing was he was naturally more interested in her mind.
“Hmm. Sounds quite illogical, Mr. Spock. Well, let’s see what Bones has to say. Doctor, here’s your… patient.”
Doctor McCoy knelt down and took a tricorder out of his medical bag. He began to scan the unconscious girl’s body. “Well, she’s human, Jim. And starting to wake up. I’m not finding any traces of injury or illness. No, wait. Now that’s interesting, I wouldn’t have expected to find something like that in a girl of her age.”
“What? What have you found?” Kirk wanted to know.
The girl moaned faintly and her eyelids flickered.
“Myopia, Jim. Severe near-sightedness. I can’t understand why it’s never been corrected! Most eye malformations and diseases are discovered and repaired at birth, have been for the last century and a half.”
The eyes in question fluttered open. The girl stared up into Spock’s face, blinking.
“There’s your explanation, Spock. She didn’t react to your appearance until you got closer because she couldn’t see you until then.”
Spock didn’t answer. All his attention was elsewhere, as he gazed down on the lovely face which was rapidly regaining its natural soft rosy hue. Even her lips had lost their color when she fainted, but now they were pink and plumply enticing.
And her eyes… he was losing himself in her eyes, which no longer showed any fear.
The girl smiled and Spock’s heart leapt in his chest.
What he didn’t realize at that moment, although MarySid would tell him, much later, was that her smile was in response to his own.
(I will totally write more if you guys like it! Srsly, let me know in the comments if you want to read more, cuz there's whole lots more to tell!! Love you guys!!!)
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 07:24 pm (UTC)To choose between the two MarySue stories is going to be really difficult. I must read them both again before I could begin to decide.
(I love your Kirk voice! It's so...like him. Hee!)
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:19 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 07:41 pm (UTC)Have you been watching Monk?
I'm looking forward to the next round!
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 07:47 pm (UTC)Your...Kirk!
multi-chaptered!
The exact same events from different POVs!
tbc?!
*dies*
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 03:11 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 03:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 07:49 pm (UTC)ETA: Poll is open in my LJ.
http://delphia2000.livejournal.com/167252.html
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:23 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 08:50 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:24 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 08:51 pm (UTC)Now I have to CHOOSE?!? *bites nails*
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:25 am (UTC)Thanks!!
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 10:09 pm (UTC)\0/ for best use of ellipses EVAH :-D
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:26 am (UTC)Inspiration... struck. *g*
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 11:46 am (UTC):-D
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 11:49 am (UTC):-D
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 10:15 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:27 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 20th, 2008 10:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 05:28 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 11:32 am (UTC)spock is like totally like yours, you know?
Heh. :-)
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 21st, 2008 11:48 am (UTC)Yes, Spock iz mine 4evah N evah, and I'm gonna have his little alien babiez!!!!!
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 22nd, 2008 04:50 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 22nd, 2008 05:59 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 22nd, 2008 09:27 am (UTC)Of course I want to read more!
(no subject)
Date: Jun. 22nd, 2008 03:05 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Jun. 23rd, 2008 05:05 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: Sep. 28th, 2009 09:03 pm (UTC)Also, ruffled bra=love
(no subject)
Date: Sep. 29th, 2009 12:41 am (UTC)I loved those pajamas. I think the pants had ruffles, too. And I think they were pink and orange. So very 1970. :-)