"Corpus Delicti", Jack/Daniel, rated PG

[sid]

This is Jack/Daniel, established relationship, early Season 7, rated PG.

Summary:  Two lovers reunited after more than a year apart.  It sounds perfect, doesn't it?

(One of those ideas that come out of nowhere and demand to be written.  So let me know if I made any goofs in my rush!)

CORPUS DELICTI   

Jack was sitting at his kitchen table in his bathrobe, staring down into a cup of coffee. It was very early in the morning, still pitch black outside. It felt like the whole world was asleep. A soft sound made his head turn towards the door. Daniel wasn’t asleep, not any more. He had been when Jack crept from the bedroom, unable to stand it a minute longer. Daniel’s figure came out of the shadows, into the edge of the light, pausing in the doorway. He was naked. Jack turned his head away.

"What’s wrong, Jack?"

"Couldn’t sleep. Didn’t mean to wake you."

"You didn’t. But you could have. It would have been nice." Jack turned his head to see Daniel smiling at him a little nervously. His eyes fell to Daniel’s smooth abdomen, and he turned his gaze away hastily. "Something is wrong."

"No," Jack said, but he knew how unconvincing he sounded.

"Did I do something?" Daniel asked. Jack shook his head, and waved his hand, but Daniel continued, "I know I don’t remember everything yet. If I did something you don’t like, or said anything weird…"

"Nothing like that, Danny." Jack looked up into his lover’s anxious face. "Don’t worry about it."

"Then what? Come on, Jack, please. Talk to me."

He didn't know what to say.  "It was…different."

"Yeah," Daniel said, half-laughing. "You have no idea." His smile faded as he watched Jack frown and visibly withdraw. "Guess you didn’t mean that in a good way," he said slowly. Jack’s eyes were drawn again to the smooth skin where a puckered appendectomy scar should have been. He winced. How could he possibly look at that and not remember what had happened to Daniel, how he had died. How he had come back. "I think I should probably go," Daniel said in a tight voice.

Jack watched as Daniel’s figure retreated back into the shadows, and disappeared down the hallway. This was completely wrong. He couldn’t let Daniel leave like this. He shouldn’t leave at all. Jack rose from the table and followed his friend.

Daniel was dressing by the light from the bedside lamp. Dressing with hurried, jerky motions. "Don’t go," Jack said.

"I don’t think you really want me here, Jack."

"Of course I do. I’m just having a little freakout. I don’t want you to leave."

Daniel finished fastening his jeans, and sank down on the side of the bed, face upturned towards Jack. After a moment’s hesitation, Jack moved to join him, sitting down close beside him, but not close enough that their bodies touched. "I don’t know what to do, Jack. Maybe it was too soon for this. Maybe it’s all a mistake. Did I get it all wrong?"

His voice held an anxious plea for reassurance, and Jack was quick to provide it. "You didn’t get anything wrong, Danny. We were lovers, we were in love. I still love you, I still want you. I feel even more for you than I did before. I almost went nuts without you." He touched Daniel’s hand. "You may not remember everything, but what you do remember, you got right."

"I love you, too," Daniel said, not looking at Jack. "We said all this last night. I meant all of it."

"So did I."

"So." Daniel looked at Jack unhappily. "It’s the sex that sucked?"

"No." Jack shook his head. "The sex didn’t suck. Only in the good way." He leaned sideways, and nudged Daniel with his shoulder.

Daniel’s lips curved. "But there’s a problem." He waited for Jack’s response.

"Let me ask you this," Jack said. "When you said, in the kitchen, about it being ‘different’. What did you mean?" Daniel was silent. "It seemed to make you happy," Jack prodded.

"Well, I’m not sure I can do it justice by putting it into words. Indescribable seems to be the best word I can come up with." Daniel was smiling and shaking his head.

"Give it a shot." Jack watched the other man’s averted face intently.

"We’ve been lovers, what? Like three years now? Or, I guess, four, if we count last year. Although I don‘t suppose we could really have been considered lovers, for the purpose of this discussion, when I was on another plane of existence."

"Daniel."

"Sorry. Um, my point is, that, uh, technically, even though I spent three years being your lover, technically, this body had never had sex at all before last night. Technically. Not with another person, anyway." Daniel blushed faintly. "So, uh, even though I knew what to expect, and how it would feel, my body…it was all new. Every touch, every kiss…it was just so sharp, so vivid. Those aren’t the right words, I can’t say it right." He studied Jack’s expression. "There’s never been anything like it, there aren’t words for it."

"Yeah, probably doesn’t happen too often. New bodies and old memories." Jack was uncomfortable even talking about it.

"But it wasn’t so good for you, was it? I guess there aren’t really words for it from your point of view either, are there?"

"I had to keep reminding myself that you were in there," Jack admitted quietly. He felt Daniel grow still beside him, hardly breathing. "It didn’t feel like you."

"Jack."

"Let me finish. I’d look at your face, and I’d see the man I love looking back at me, but this man didn’t have scars where he should have scars, and he didn’t react the way…the way Daniel would have reacted." Jack swallowed hard. "I was looking at my Danny, but I was inside a stranger." Daniel hunched over beside him. "I’m sorry. I wanted to welcome you home, really home. It was supposed to be like a homecoming for both of us, but it didn’t feel that way at all."

Daniel didn‘t move, didn‘t look up. Jack‘s heart ached with the pain his words had caused. Finally Daniel spoke. "I can’t ever be that Daniel again. I may never get all my memories back, and I certainly can’t get my old body back. And I’m sure I’ve probably changed in ways that neither one of us can even see yet. Because, even though I can’t remember being Ascended, just knowing that I was has to change me somehow."

Jack shifted uncomfortably. "Daniel, don’t make too much out of this. I’m sure I’ll get over it. I just, well, I felt disappointed, I guess. And kinda freaked out." Jack looked over at Daniel, who was studying the floor, brow furrowed. "Actually, it kinda freaks me out to think that somebody who was Ascended could be interested in a guy like me. Like, you should want something better. Way better."

"What I want doesn’t seem to be the issue. It’s what you want. And can’t have." Daniel sounded hopeless.

Jack shook his head earnestly. "I want you. That’s it, bottom line, you’re it."

"No. You want him. Your Daniel. And I’m not him, not anymore. " Two tears ran down Daniel’s cheeks. Jack edged closer, and put a tentative arm across Daniel’s bare shoulders. "And if I’m not him, who the hell am I? And if I’m not yours…" Daniel choked.

"You are mine. Danny, I just got you back. You honestly think I would ever let you go now?" Jack tightened his grip, and leaned his head against Daniel’s. "Don’t talk that way." With his other hand he reached up and gently rubbed the tears away. Daniel grabbed his hand, and held on to it tightly. "I know just how incredibly lucky I am. Don’t let me blow it."

Daniel laughed, and sniffed. "You know, that reminds me. This body is still a virgin in a few regards."

"We’ll take care of that," Jack murmured. "We’ll take care of everything."

Daniel shifted, and put his arms around Jack. "But you’ve got to stop freaking out."

Jack nuzzled him. "I know. I’m just still getting used to you really being back. And I kept hoping you’d remember…us. And when you finally did…"

"It didn’t work out quite the way you planned," Daniel sighed, stroking Jack’s face. Jack made a sound that signified his assent, and moved to capture Daniel’s lips. This felt familiar enough. Daniel tasted much as he had always done. His mouth moved against his own with the same tenderness and strength Jack had always loved. Had it really been so different last night? Or was he adjusting to the new incarnation of Daniel, making new memories?

He had to stop looking at Daniel’s splendid new body as evidence of what had been cruelly ripped from him, and start enjoying it as the gift that it was.

Starting now.

 

THE END

Comments

[dianehc.livejournal.com]

Just when the dream comes true, reality strikes. I love it.

Sweetly sad and happy in one great mix.

[sid]

Thank you! I think there would be a period of adjustment for any couple reunited after that long. And then when you toss in the creepifying scifi aspects...

I don't blame Jack for freaking! He's ready to be happy now, though.
:-)