'Ob-La-Di', Jack/Daniel, rated R

[sid]

About 1,950 words, rated R for language.  Two friends caught in a bad situation and mis-reading each other's reactions.

Beta kudos to the-no-longer-virginal zats_clear!

Ob-La-Di

SG-1’s debrief was tense, and behind closed doors. As they all crowded into General Hammond’s office, Dr. Fraiser pulled a chair to the end of his desk, where she could keep an eye on Daniel.  He stood against the wall at the other end, arms folded and head down, knowing she was watching him; they were all watching him, or trying not to.

 

Jack sat between Sam and Teal’c, or, to be more precise, he put Teal’c between himself and Daniel. He hadn’t come near Daniel since it happened. Sure, he’d asked him if he was all right, voice shaking. Daniel had only been able to nod, speechless and shocked. Jack had barely looked at or spoken to him since. Daniel was surprised by the depth of the bitterness he was feeling. Because it wasn’t Jack’s fault; none of it. It was a bad situation all around, but it was worse for Jack, and Daniel felt sorry for him; he really did.

 

Jack couldn’t help reacting the way he was, and if Daniel had been more careful what he wished for, it wouldn’t be hurting this much to watch his friend pull away.

 

Sam was telling Hammond the story, since Jack’s version presumably would be unreliable. Daniel was pretty foggy on most of the details himself, but he was more or less tuning her out anyway. He’d read the written reports later; right now all he wanted was to be allowed to go home. He wanted to drink a couple of glasses of cold water and wash down the two sleeping pills Janet had given him and put this day into the past.

 

Hammond was asking questions now and Jack was giving him quiet answers. Daniel watched Jack’s feet and saw how they constantly shifted. Left foot in an inch, right foot back an inch, left foot on its toe, heel working back and forth, right foot back and sharply to the side where it hit the chair leg. He wondered what Jack was thinking. Probably better he didn’t know.

 

Now Janet was giving her medical report. He and Jack had been kept in isolation until all their lab results had been rushed through. Blood work clean, vitals normal and stable, insignificant minor injuries sustained by Dr. Jackson. Daniel looked up in surprise. He’d given Janet his permission to discuss his condition fully with his team and Hammond, so he’d been expecting something a little less…vague.

 

Okay, he’d been frankly bracing himself for something a lot less vague, because it would be no fun at all to have the condition of his rectal tissues featured as a subject of discussion in an official debriefing. Janet was giving him a small smile, and Daniel twisted his lips into a response before ducking his head back down.

 

“That is welcome news,” Teal’c was saying, and Daniel peered up at him under his eyelashes, but Teal’c was looking over at Janet and Daniel’s gaze slid to Jack’s white face and down to his tightly clasped hands. Clenched. Words. Nuances.

 

General Hammond was speaking, to him, and Daniel listened to the gentle, paternal tones and took in the underlying meaning and nodded his head in answer, in thanks. In a daze. Then they were dismissed, and filing out into the briefing room.

 

“I’ve got sick people to get back to,” Janet said, and with a lingering pat on his arm she was gone.

 

“Are you heading home, Daniel?” Sam asked gingerly.

 

“Oh, yes,” he answered. As fast as possible.

 

“Need anything?” Jack really should have cleared his throat first; that could have come out better.

 

Daniel shook his head.

 

“Should you drive?” Teal’c asked bluntly.

 

“Um.”

 

“That’s a no.” Jack turned on his heel and strode to the telephone, squeezing Teal’c’s elbow on the way past. “I’ll get an airman to meet you up top.”

 

“I’ll need my car this weekend,” Daniel said loudly.

 

Jack nodded and held up two fingers to indicate two airmen, and didn’t look at him.

 

Just get me out of here.

 

~~~~

 

It was a fairly peaceful weekend. Sam didn’t call more than five times a day, and any phone conversation with Teal’c was always a bizarre delight. Janet stopped by once for ten minutes, on her way to pick Cassie up at the mall, and stood in his living room, swinging her keys in the air, projecting “I am very busy and you are a mere afterthought,” for all she was worth.

 

There was no word from Jack, but then Daniel hadn’t expected any, and he was pretty confident that Jack was keeping himself well-informed. Teal’c’s “O’Neill desires that I should say to you ‘hello’, DanielJackson,” was a dead giveaway, and no doubt intended as such. Daniel found it reassuring. That had also no doubt been intended.

 

~~~~

 

The first thing he saw on his desk Monday morning was a note from Jack. Please see me in my office at 0915. He could count on the fingers of one hand the number of times he’d been in Jack’s office. Jack normally preferred to conduct team business almost anywhere else, from the mess hall to Teal’c’s quarters.

 

So, matters were obviously coming to a head, which was just as well. Eggshells and tenterhooks and tightropes had no place in their line of work. Probably Jack simply wanted to straighten things out just as much as he did. Hopefully. Maybe.

 

But the pit of his stomach didn’t think so. The pit of his stomach thought that Jack O’Neill couldn’t live with what had happened. 

 

~~~~

 

Daniel appeared in Jack’s doorway at the appointed hour, entered in response to Jack’s nod, closed the door with a soft click and sat down. His palms were sweating.

 

“So,” Jack said, and Daniel had never seen him looking more miserable and uncomfortable. Other than last Friday, of course, but shock had really been the overriding sensation then, so close to the event, for them both.

 

“So,” Daniel answered.

 

“Fuckin’ aliens, huh?” Jack said with a sideways twist to his mouth.

 

“Yeah.” Fucking aliens with their fucking drugs that made one friend fuck another for whatever sort of fucking twisted pleasure it brought them. “Fuck ‘em all.”

 

“Yeah,” Jack agreed, staring down at his clasped hands.

 

Daniel decided to cut to the chase and maybe spare them both some time and suffering. “So, are you going to fire me? Reassign me?”

 

“What?” Jack’s head jerked up.

 

Daniel gestured at the desk between them. “This seems awfully formal,” he said tightly.

 

“I’m not going to fire you!” Jack said, gaping. “Why the hell would I?”

 

“I thought that would be obvious,” Daniel replied, beginning to believe that maybe his gut instinct was all wrong.

 

“Not to me.” Jack visibly gathered himself. “If anyone goes, it should be me.”

 

“What?” Daniel’s jaw dropped.

 

“After what’s happened it’s undoubtedly going to be difficult for you to work with me, and…”

 

“Why? You didn’t do anything wrong!”

 

“Just because I didn’t have any choice doesn’t make it right,” Jack said bitterly.

 

“Well, no, obviously not! But…” Daniel floundered.

 

“Look, neither one of us was himself. If you’d been, you would’ve stopped me, and if I’d been, I never would’ve done it.” Jack’s voice was flat and his face was rigid.

 

“So, the truth is that you’re going to find it hard to work with me,” Daniel finally managed to say.

 

Jack frowned. “Only because I’m going to feel like a piece of shit every time I look at you. It’s hardly the same thing.”

 

“Hardly the same thing as what? What are you talking about?” Daniel wrinkled his brow.

 

Jack closed his eyes for a moment. “Why are you making me say this?”

 

Daniel exhaled loudly. “Because that’s the only way I’m going to know what you’re trying to tell me. Or avoid telling me. Or something.”

 

“I’m just saying there’s a difference…there’s one major difference between what happened to you and what happened to me.”

 

“I was penetrated,” Daniel said, realized.

 

“Yes,” Jack said. “And that’s rape.”

 

Daniel shook his head. “If there was rape it happened to both of us equally, not one more than the other.”

 

“You can’t tell me it’s the same, Daniel,” Jack said wearily. “For that to happen to a man…we both know it’s not the same.”

 

“Oh,” Daniel said in soft shock. “You think I hated it.”

 

“Well, not at the time,” Jack said, wincing. No, they’d both enjoyed every second of it while it was happening. Enthusiastically. “But now that you’re back to your senses, I know it’s got to be doing a number on you.”

 

“Not nearly as big as the number you’re doing on yourself,” Daniel admonished gently.

 

Jack met his eyes. “I know it wasn’t my fault. Let’s not start that again. But it still makes me feel sick when I think of what I did to you.”

 

“Oh, Jack. Shit. Shit.” Daniel closed his eyes. “I’m probably going to regret this, but if it ends up helping you at all, I’ll say it was worth it.”

 

“Huh? What?”

 

“That wasn’t my first time. I’ve done that before.  And enjoyed it.” He looked at Jack’s wide eyes. “Penetrative sex,” Daniel said clearly. “I don’t have a problem with it.”

 

“You…”

 

“Oh, Jack.” Daniel didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “The look on your face.”

 

Jack clenched his fists on the edge of his desk and leaned forward over them a little bit. He was motionless for a few seconds. When his head came up his face was a little flushed and his eyes were soft with gratitude. “That look’s called relief, Daniel.”

 

“I was thinking more along the lines of ‘goggle-eyed’, but whatever you say.” And suddenly they were beaming at each other, and the tension in the room hadn’t gone away, but had altered itself into something that made Daniel feel good to be alive, and he let himself get carried away. “I wouldn’t have stopped you; you were wrong about that.”

 

Jack’s smile vanished in an instant. “Don’t,” he said sharply.

 

Shit! “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that,” Daniel mumbled. 

 

“I can’t listen to that kind of talk.”

 

“I said I was sorry!”

 

“I’m sorry, too,” Jack said emphatically.

 

“What? Oh! Oh.”

 

“This does not leave my office. You understand?”

 

“I’m not really sure,” Daniel confessed.

 

Jack grimaced. “This conversation has become inappropriate for me to participate in as an officer in the United States Air Force.”

 

“Participate.”

 

“Yes.”

 

“If it weren’t inappropriate, there would be participating, by you.”

 

Jack hesitated and looked like a cornered animal. “Yes.”

 

“So, just to clarify?” Jack winced, and Daniel finished hurriedly, “You maybe feel things that you can’t talk about, and you can’t let me talk about the things that I might possibly be feeling.”

 

Jack spread his hands slowly.

 

“But, um, we’re back on track? Aside from the whole not talking thing, we’re solid?”

 

Jack tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. “I feel good.”

 

“That’s…will we talk about this again?”

 

Jack’s face went blank. “Not any time soon.”

 

Daniel tightened his lips and nodded. “So, is that your way of not-saying that I should just forget the whole thing and move on? Or maybe you’re planning to.”

 

Jack shook his head. “I’m not planning anything, Daniel.”

 

Daniel thought for a few moments and then smiled slowly. “I am.”

 

Half a dozen expressions passed over Jack’s face. “Daniel…”

 

Daniel rose and crossed the room to put his hand on the doorknob. “Doesn’t leave this office.”

 

Jack dipped his head in acknowledgment. “Thank you.”

 

“But just so you know…I feel good.” Daniel smiled broadly.

 

More expressions flitted over Jack’s face, but the predominant one was pleasure. “Sweet.”

 

Daniel left the room, closing the door firmly behind him.

 

And life went on.

Comments

[princessofg.livejournal.com]

VBG

You know, it's not often that I beg for a sequel, because that's generally so unfair to the writer. But for this one, I'm begging.

Gorgeous dialogue, gorgeous progression of the events, never a wasted word. thank you.

[sid]

You know, I had to think about it. But if something were to make Jack say to himself, "Screw the regulations"...something, say, like Ascension... (drops into Story Ideas folder)

never a wasted word

zats_clear helped with that. :-)

Very glad you enjoyed!

[melayneseahawk.livejournal.com]

Seconded!

[sid]

:-) Noted! Thank you for voting!

[melayneseahawk.livejournal.com]

Teehee.

[ivorygates]

*Awwwww*

(hugs them both!)

Lovely story! You so rock!

[sid]

Thanks muchly! If they won't hug each other, we'll just have to do all the hugging. *nods*

[ivorygates]

Someday....

[sid]

Oh, indubitably. :-)

[seleneheart]

Somehow this is very intense without going into much detail about what happened. (Perhaps we're all so accustomed to this trope, that we don't need the actual details.) Their dialog at the end was wonderful.

[sid]

The first AMTDI that I wrote had the detailed sex scene - maybe I got it out of my system? *g* Actually it was intrinsic to the plot that time around. Here, there are no motivations or revelations during the sexual act itself, since it was all drug induced. (But if I do a sequel, I'm thinking: FLASHBACK!)

So happy you liked the scene in Jack's office! :-)

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

Oh, I love Aliens Made Them that really gets into the consequences. I also love those "waiting for retirement" angsty-future-hope, stories -- so this is a two-fer! Lovely. Love Jack's oblique message-via-Teal'c over the weekend. They know each other so well. :-)

[sid]

Yay for two-fers!! :-)

Jack's message to Daniel just had to be there, when you stop and think about it. There was no way that Jack would not let Daniel know that he was concerned, even if he was staying far away out of (mis-placed) consideration. *sigh*

[green-grrl.livejournal.com]

Yes! ♥

[tenaya.livejournal.com]

I loved the emphasis on the emotional currents rather than the details of what happened. Each of the characters had a different yet very in character way of showing their concern for Daniel. A lovely little story. Thank you for sharing this; I really enjoyed it.

[sid]

I'm very glad that the emphasis of the story worked for you. It seems a little strange to present an AMTDI fic without any of the actual "Doing" included, but I've done it a couple of times now!

I'm also very glad to get the opportunity to tell you that Forced Perspectives is one of my most favorite fics ever. :-)

[tenaya.livejournal.com]

What also was interesting is that you told this from Daniel's pov, but the reader was kept in the dark about what Daniel felt about the whole thing. Yeah, he was embarrassed and wanted the day to end to put it past him but he was focused on how everyone was treating him. We felt his anxiety, but his anxiety was really about other people. Jack's distancing caused even more anxiety. And then, we find out Daniel isn't devastated by the experience and we share Jack's shock about why not. Cool.

Thank you for the kind words about Forced Perspectives. That's pretty high praise and I appreciate it. :::blushes:::

[sid]

I think I tend not to get too far inside my character's heads. Scratch that - I tend not to reveal too much of what my characters are thinking.

For this story I actually got two pieces of paper and scribbled down What Jack's Thinking/Feeling/Getting Wrong and the same for Daniel. Since I wasn't going to spell everything out as I went along, I wanted to make sure I had it all firmly in mind and kept them consistent.

The guilty pleasure for me about 'Forced Perspectives' is that the AU!Jack is commiting criminal acts right and left - but I can't hate him. He's so matter-of-fact about it all as he twistedly seduces poor Daniel. and me

[tenaya.livejournal.com]

Oh! I forgot to ask, which are your other AMTDI fics? I just went to Area 52 and I see you have 95 stories there! Oh my god, that's gonna take me awhile!

[sid]

http://www.area52hkh.net/ass/sid/silverli.php AMTDI - with a twist.

http://www.area52hkh.net/ass/sid/changes.php This one was actually my first non-PWP story.

*wrinkles brow* Those are the only two I can think of. 95 stories? I might have forgotten one. LOL

[tenaya.livejournal.com]

Could be, but this gives me a place to start. Thanks!

[jd-junkie.livejournal.com]

You know, I'm not a huge AMTDI fan. Too many fics get hung up on the sex and ignore the fallout. Me being the angstjunkie and words-as-porn junkie that I am, prefer the fallout. And that's why this really worked for me.
Less was more .. and now I want even more ;-)
Nice work!

[sid]

*tallies up another vote for a sequel-type-thingamabob*

There are so many roads to take with AMTDI, from downright horror to outright comedy. But if they start hollering the equivalent of: "Yeah, more, harder! And let's do this again as soon as we get home!" in what is apparently meant to be a serious fic, then, yeah, that just doesn't do it for me.

Fallout is groovy; angst and pain and doubt and all that good stuff! :-)

[zats-clear.livejournal.com]

Jack shook his head. “I’m not planning anything, Daniel.”

Daniel thought for a few moments and then smiled slowly. “I am.”

I still hold that your Daniel is a veeerrry baaaaad boy here! And second third fourth fifth the desire to see where he makes good on this statement ;)

btw, was sent over to you by ivorygates to ask you about Pyrex toys...care to comment?
Original conversation here if you've not followed along and damn she's funny! (http://ivorygates.livejournal.com/33528.html)

[sid]

Daniel's had a taste of something he'd like to add to his regular diet. ;-)

I commented on her journal, hee! Why clutter up my own lj with pr0ny images? Let me know if you need a link to the stories that go with the picture. *whistles nonchalantly*

[entrenous.livejournal.com]

I said at work the other day that someone was making "google eyes" at me, and another coworker popped up and said, "You mean, web site eyes?" It pretty much devolved from there, and it was exactly the same thing I thought when I read about Jack looking at Daniel "google eyed." Eh, it works in my head, anyway.

I liked this very much. Just very understated, like it's a secret for only them. :)

[sid]

Flabbergasted works, too. ;-)

I'm glad you enjoyed it! That's an interesting observation, about secrecy, because obviously several other people know exactly what happened. BUT...they're all taking the high road and letting Jack and Daniel deal with it on their own terms. Giving them the privacy that the aliens took away.

And then J/D have their own understated, not-talking way of confronting the issue, and in the end they wind up with a secret they won't even share with each other!! *giggle*

[kuonji14.livejournal.com]

“I’m not planning anything, Daniel.”

Daniel thought for a few moments and then smiled slowly. “I am.”

Ha, that's fantastic! Daniel taking charge.

And sorry for the long quote, but I particularly liked this whole section below. It's such a wonderful and skillful mix of humor, irony, and genuineness of life. And nice characterization. :)

It was a fairly peaceful weekend. Sam didn’t call more than five times a day, and any phone conversation with Teal’c was always a bizarre delight. Janet stopped by once for ten minutes, on her way to pick Cassie up at the mall, and stood in his living room, swinging her keys in the air, projecting “I am very busy and you are a mere afterthought,” for all she was worth.

There was no word from Jack, but then Daniel hadn’t expected any, and he was pretty confident that Jack was keeping himself well-informed. Teal’c’s “O’Neill desires that I should say to you ‘hello’, DanielJackson,” was a dead giveaway, and no doubt intended as such. Daniel found it reassuring. That had also no doubt been intended.

[kuonji14.livejournal.com]

Oh, btw, what does the title mean? And in what language? :)

[sid]

It's the title of a song from the Beatles 'White Album'. I don't think the title means anything, but one of the other lines in the song ties in nicely with the last line of my story.

http://download.yousendit.com/7C9EC05D4F15FA48

Let me know if this link doesn't work for you! :-)

[kuonji14.livejournal.com]

Oh, thanks! I like it. It has a fun, bouncy rhythm to it. I had thought that maybe Ob-La-Di meant "Life goes on" in another language. :)

[sid]

I'm glad you liked the section you quoted. It sort of falls under the heading of "Telling, Not Showing", which is often construed as a Bad Thing. I guess if you Tell it well, you can get away with it. Thank you. :-)

Daniel is planning to have a future with Jack come hell or high water, and we all know what he's like when he sinks his teeth into a problem! Hee! (he wants more of that good sex, yep.)

[kuonji14.livejournal.com]

I guess if you Tell it well, you can get away with it. Heh, yuppers!

Oh god, Jack better watch out! ;)

[msbeata.livejournal.com]

Oh I like this and I also vote for a sequel.

Is it wrong of me to want a briefing featuring the condition of Daniel's rectal tissues?

[sid]

"Hmm, my notes appear to read: Tender and Succulent. I think I need to have a word with Nurse O'Brien."

:-D

Glad you enjoyed!!

[msbeata.livejournal.com]

*grinning like a loon*

[starting-gate.livejournal.com]

"Need anything?" Jack really should have cleared his throat first; that could have come out better.

This was full of great little details like that!

I love fallout fic, and seeing the consequences of their actions. Obviously in the series, it's impossible, so I appreciate it all the more in fic.

La la la la life goes on. :)

[sid]

Ob La Di Bla Da!!!

I'm glad to hear you appreciated all the little details - I think they're the nice touches that make writing (and reading) so much fun. :-)

Hmm, I'll have to try to think of some K/S tidbits. *g*

[justhuman.livejournal.com]

Nice! Really well told, skipping the details and focussing on the immediate reactions. I also love the second part of the story being told by the reactions of the other people.

Jack and Daniel was also well handled, giving us the slash through the restraint. I'm with the first commenter, because Daniel really does have something planned :)

[sid]

Thank you! So glad you enjoyed the sneaky subtle approach I used. :-)

Daniel has communicated a small portion of his plan to me - and it doesn't seem all that exciting on the surface. Hmmm. I think he's going for the subtle approach! Light a match, end up with fireworks? Hmmm.

[captainlogic.livejournal.com]

Ooohh an AMTDI which says 'bah' to cliched tradition of them fallling hopelessly into each others arms and acutally deals with pesky real life consequences. Brava!

[sid]

Thank you! They're just going to have to wait a while before they can fall into each other's arms. But they'll undoubtedly get there in the end.

:-)